Pope to Mafia: "Go to Hell!"

For the most part, Mafiosi appear to be diehard, Bible-thumping Catholics.  

In a contest to see which’d give them bigger knee-shaking night sweats, my suspicion is the wrath of God would beat out the wrath of their Godfather every time. 

So when Pope Francis excommunicated the Mafia today – an act which, if I’m not mistaken, automatically plops the whole kit ‘n kaboodle on a fast track to Hell – most Mafiosi sat up and took notice. 

Now the question is:  Will Mafiosi drop out of the Mafia like flies off a Raid-sprayed cake?  Or will most finally declare Hell merely a FigNewton of the human imagination? 

Stay tuned, children, for the next episode in this thrilling reality-show drama! 

In the meantime, I’m naming this Pope the best and bravest in the long, somewhat tarnished history of Popedom! 

Go HERE and HERE for more on the story.  

10 STATES TO avoid LIKE BIRD FLU

A better title for the recent article “Life in the Most Religious [i.e., Christian] States*” might be “10 States You’d Sooner Shave Your Eyebrows Off Than Live In.” 

Although the author** took it for granted he’d find 10 stunningly gorgeous states, what he actually found were states stuffed full of sick poor people, jails packed to the gills, spit-poor schools, and smokers by the Greyhound-bus load.   

Few dudes in Christian States are paid more than peanuts, few live long, no one bathes in more pornography, and no one is more likely to die in the electric chair -- or at the end of the barrel of a gun. 

The moral: Christianity is a cattle prod the rich use to keep the poor in line (“only the poor get into heaven" ... "turn the other cheek when the Rich stun you with their cattle prod" ... "give Caesar [i.e., the Rich] whatever he tells you to – and hey, Boy!  Better bow, scrape and simper when ya do!" ...). 

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*Mississippi, Utah, Alabama, Louisiana, Arkansas, South Carolina, Tennessee, North Carolina, Georgia and Oklahoma.

**A “Distinguished Service Professor of Law, [at the] University of Chicago”

fibbing ABOUT THE MOON

No, Virginia, there is no Man in the Moon.

Now, don’t cry.  I know Daddy said there was -- but he fibbed. 

It’s the Moon Goddess who’s in the moon.  But since your Daddy YAJ* has a chip on his shoulder about goddesses (including the moon one), he’s tried hard to stuff them all under a pillow. 

But YAJ is a bunch of fluff butter.  He doesn’t know beans from banjos.  In actuality ... 

“... All the world over, it’s goddesses, not gods, who are linked to the moon.  It’s easy to see why: as if by magic, women shed blood in time with the moon’s cycles – and still live to tell the tale. This link between goddesses and the moon seems to be an old one, with moon goddesses apparently going back to the Palaeolithic.  Just one example is the Venus of Laussel, a 20,000-year-old goddess figurine holding a crescent moon in her right hand.”** 

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* “Daddy YAJ” is Yahweh/Allah/Jehovah, the god of Abraham.  Muslims, Christians and practicing Jews try to spin the yarn that YAJ is three different deities, but he’s not.  He’s just one god who loves war, and hates women, animals and the earth.   

** from Breaking the Mother Goose Code: How a Fairy Tale Character Fooled the World for 300 Years.  Coming this fall to an online bookstore near you. 

THESE DUDES rock AND rule!

RIDDLE: What do Native Americans, ancient European Pagans, and the Southeast Asian Minangkabau have in common?

ANSWER: YAJ* tried his darndest to stomp all of them into the ground. 

Of the three, only the Minang -- the largest matriarchal society in the world (they number in the millions) -- outwitted Mr. YAJ.   

Today, the Minang own and run banks, bookstores, schools and satellite dishes.  As anthropologist P.R. Sanday puts it,  Minang is “a modern society all the more interesting for its matriarchal values in a world torn by conflict, strife, and male dominance.” 

The Minang aren’t ruled by men or women, but by adat matriarchaat, a set of rules based on nature and motherhood. 

When Allah tried to rip the adat away from the Minang back in the late 18th century, they fought like bloody heck – and won!  This was “the Pradi War.”  

Plant growth along with other features of nature gave the Minang their rules for living.  For ex., if tiny, vulnerable rice seeds aren’t protected, there’s no rice, and people bite the dust – starve to death.

Likewise, tiny and vulnerable people must be protected (women, children, elderly, etc.).

The Minang go with the good in nature and pitch the bad.  So the violence of nature (bad) is pitched.  “Any one who stands in the way of truth by acting discourteously or resorting to the use of force is exiled from the community or shunned.” 

PROPOSITION:  the entire world should switch to the Minang Way.  I mean it!  All of you: save your pennies, catch a plane to Sumatra, make some Minang friends, come back, teach your country how to be Minang!

And if you are Minang and read this post, please leave us poor suffering Americans a comment or two!  Teach us how you stay peaceful, equal and happy!     

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* Yahweh-Allah-Jehovah, or “YAJ” for short -- the God of Abraham. 

AMERICA THE pitiful

When I was little, people liked to strike up the band and sing “America the Beautiful.”*

America today, however, is far from beautiful. 

The last beautiful place was the Indus Valley Civilization, a goddess-centered civilization that flourished from around 2600-1500 BC. 

In the Indus Valley, no one was poor, everyone was equal, and everyone owned the same-sized, nice houses.  In these houses, everyone enjoyed the same fine furniture and other stuff.  

No war marred this marvelous picture (see archaeologist Jane McIntosh’s A Peaceful Realm: The Rise and Fall of the Indus Civilization). 

What’s more, every Indus person owned indoor plumbing.  Universal indoor plumbing didn’t happen again for another 4000 years -- around 1960, in Western countries.  (Ancient Rome had indoor plumbing – but only for la-de-dahs.) 

Now take a gander at Jehovah-soaked America: sweeping poverty, hungry babies, joblessness, sadness, hopelessness, despair.   Wounded, legless, armless Vets begging for health care, can’t get it, committing suicide. 

Indoor plumbing for everyone?  Yeah – but how many can afford to keep it running up to snuff? 

America?  I’d love to call you beautiful, sweetie. 

I’d also, however, like to call myself logical. 

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*O beautiful for spacious skies, 
For amber waves of grain, 
For purple mountain majesties, 
Above the fruited plain! 
America! America! 
God shed his grace on thee, 
And crown thy good with brotherhood 
From sea to shining sea! 



O beautiful for pilgrim feet, 
Whose stern impassioned stress.
A thoroughfare of freedom beat, 
Across the wilderness! 
America! America! 
God mend thine every flaw, 
Confirm thy soul in self-control, 
Thy liberty in law! 



O beautiful for heroes proved, 
In liberating strife. 
Who more than self their country loved,
And mercy more than life! 
America! America! 
May God thy gold refine, 
Till all success be nobleness, 
And every gain divine! 



O beautiful for patriot dream, 
That sees beyond the years. 
Thine alabaster cities gleam, 
Undimmed by human tears! 
America! America! 
God shed his grace on thee, 
And crown thy good with brotherhood, 
From sea to shining sea!