ATHANA'S Recipe FOR First-Time VOTERS

Are you a first-time voter in this presidential election? Confused about who to vote for? Actually, it's really quite simple.

First, pick a party.

In America only two parties stand a snowball's chance of winning the Presidency: the Democratic and Republican Parties.

Any Democratic candidate is mostly going to do what past Democratic presidents have done. Likewise, any Republican candidate is going to do what past Republican presidents did.

So figure out which party makes the most sense to you. And then vote for that party's presidential pick.

Here's how the two parties stack up against each other:

1. HOW THEY SEE THE LESS FORTUNATE:

Democratic Presidents: WE SHOULD HELP THEM.
Republican Presidents: THEY'RE LAZY BUMS.

The only presidents who really fought to help black Americans were two Democrats: John F. Kennedy and Lyndon Johnson. Franklin Roosevelt -- a Democrat -- also fought for the less fortunate.

When Democrats want to help people, Republicans -- for example Ronald Reagan -- call them names like "Tax and Spend Liberals" -- in order to smear and smash them.


2. HOW THEY SEE PEOPLE WHO DON'T OWN THEIR OWN BUSINESSES ("Workers"):

Democratic Presidents: AS IMPORTANT AS "OWNERS."
Republican Presidents: AS WORTHLESS, GREEDY BUMS.

Democratic presidents work to help Workers. They try to help Workers get together and stand up for themselves when Owners try to hurt them (i.e., the Workers).

Republican presidents usually help Owners screw Workers. They try to help Owners smack down Workers whenever Workers get together to stand up for themselves. This goes for all Workers, whether auto workers, secretaries, lawyers, doctors, teachers, etc.


3. ABOUT GUNS:

Democratic presidents: WANT LAWS ABOUT WHO CAN OWN WHAT KIND.
Republican presidents: GENERALLY DON'T WANT GUN LAWS.


4. ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT

Democratic presidents: WANT TO PROTECT IT.
Republican presidents: WANT TO DESTROY IT.

Democratic presidents think we humans are causing global warming. They want us to stop.

Republican presidents think destroying the environment means more oil, profit, money and riches for them and other Republicans.

At the Republican convention a few weeks ago, the whole crowd chanted "Drill, baby, drill!" They meant drill for oil in places that would destroy the environment forever, and cause the extinction of animal species -- forever.

Sarah Palin thinks that the kazillions of humans burning kazillions of tons of oil, coal and gasoline for decades, has nothing to do with global warming.


5. WHAT'S THE RIGHT WAY TO SOLVE PROBLEMS?

Democratic Presidents: TALK THEM OUT, "DIPLOMACY" FIRST.
Republican Presidents: YOU BOMB PEOPLE.

I give you George W. Bush, who bombed first and then ... well, actually, Dubya never did do any talking, before or after bombing Iraq.

I give you John McCain, who thinks war is a cute joke. In front of TV cameras he sang "Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, Iran," to the tune of the fifties love song "Ba, Ba, Ba, Ba, Ba, Barbara Ann..."


6. THE ELECTION CAMPAIGNS ...

... Of Democratic Presidents: ... TEND TO BE HONEST.
... Of Republican Presidents: ... CHOCK FULL OF LYING, CHEATING, AND STEALING

I know of no dishonesty -- let alone major scandals -- perped by any Democratic presidential candidate on his opponent.

On the other hand, for the past 20 years, every presidential election has had major Republican scams targeting Democratic opponents. On a regular basis Republicans use lying, cheating, and stealing just to smear -- and thereby defeat -- Democrats. These scams are so big and well known that they even have names that everyone remembers to this day: "The Swift Boat ads," "Willy Horton," and "October Surprise."

Go on, Google these phrases. You'll choke under the load of garbage that comes up.


7. ABOUT FEAR:

Democratic presidents AREN'T JAMMED FULL OF FEAR.
Republican presidents ARE JAMMED FULL OF FEAR.

Democrats realize the world is a dangerous place, but they don't let fear cloud their judgment about it. You can see this lack of fear in their bodies; Democratic presidents look loose, calm and fluid: think Barack Obama, John F. Kennedy or Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

Republican presidents ARE JAMMED FULL OF FEAR.

You can see this in the stiffness of their bodies. Republican presidents try to get all of us afraid. That way they can bend us to their will.

The bodies of Republican presidents look stiff, unbending, and like they're going to crack. Look at John McCain, Richard Nixon or Ronald Reagan. They all look like boards stood upright in a corner.

So, all you first-time voters out there: what kind of person are you?

Are you the kind who thinks everyone less fortunate than you is faking it? If so, you probably belong in the Republican Party.

If not, vote for Obama.

Do you think Owners are royalty and Workers are less imporant people? If so, you belong in the Republican Party. Vote for McCain.

If not, vote for Obama.

Do you think anyone anywhere of any age should be able to walk in anywhere and buy a submachine gun? If so, you belong in the Republican Party. Or should we have laws requiring people to have background checks before they buy a gun? If so, you belong in the Democratic Party.

Vote for Obama.

Do you think there's nothing we can do about global warming and that trashing the environment is no biggie -- who needs all those species, anyway? Who needs the rainforest and the oxygen it provides for we kazillion humans? If this is how you feel, you belong in the Republican Party.

If not, vote for Obama.

Do you think "real men" are John Wayne types who shoot first and talk later? If so, vote for McCain. Or is trying to talk it out first, better? If so, you're a Democrat -- vote for Obama.

Do you think honest people are wimps? Vote for McCain. Would we all live in a better world if all of us were honest? Vote for Obama.

And finally, would someone riddled with fear be best to lead the free world? Then your party is Republican.

Otherwise, vote for Barack Obama.
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thnx to corkaborka77 for the fine foto; go HERE to see more.