Friday, August 28, 2009

PLEASE Pass THE YAJ*

Ever notice how YAJ* barks and bites at himself -- 24/7? It’s not just Yahweh stomping on Allah, Allah jumping on Jehovah, and Jehovah yammering away at Yahweh. It’s Baptists beating up on Methodists, and Methodists mopping the floor with Mormons.

And each sect beats up on its own, the Reformed Baptists blistering the Free Will Baptists, and the Evangelical Methodists bellowing about how the United Methodists don’t have a *clue.*

And so on.

Even in YAJ houses of worship there’s a feast of fussing and fighting. How to spend the church coffers. Who to hire to replace the priest (rabbi, iman, etc.). How many angels can dance on the head of a pin.

Maybe the way to sweep away the entire mess is just to let YAJ fight himself harder and faster, and faster and harder -- until he becomes a puddle of butter.

And we can take that butter home to Mama, who’ll make us some pancakes.

Yum!
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*YAJ: the god Yahweh-Allah-Jehovah. Most think YAJ is three separate gods, but they're wrong. YAJ is just one mean old dude with a split personality. He's the god of the Old Testament patriarch Abraham.
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Thnx to jeromestarkey for the foto of the Afghan dog fight. Go HERE to see more of his work.

2 comments:

Gary O said...

Reminds me of the following scene from Monty Python's "The Life of Brian":

Reg The only people we hate more than the
Romans are the fucking Judean People's Front.
PFJ Yeah
Judith Splitters.
Francis And the Judean Popular Peoples Front.
PFJ Oh yeah. Splitters.
Loretta And the peoples Front of Judea.
PFJ Splitters.
Reg What?
Loretta The Peoples front of Judea. Splitters.
Reg We're the Peoples front of Judea.
Loretta Oh. I thought we were the Popular Front.
Reg Peoples Front.
Francis Whatever happened to the Popular Front, Reg?
Reg He's over there.
--------[A single old man sits on a lower seat.]
PFJ [To the old man.] SPLITTER!

Iritar said...

Pancakes, but I'd be afraid the butter would be too sour from the negativity, LOL!